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d-girls image by artist Tashina Suzuki.

This is the first time I’ve been out of my pajamas before noon in two years.  I’ve been at my new job for a week now, and I have not alienated any of my new co-workers, which is a small accomplishment.  Because I have to drive my new boss around, however, I’ve gotten lost about a hundred and fifty times. I’ll never get used to the sprawling nature of the streets of Los Angeles and I miss the smelly, crowded subways of NYC chauffeuring me around, although after 9/11 the Famous Actress didn’t make us take the subway, mostly due to the Famous Actor/Conspiracy Theorist who had a production deal with us.  He brought in personalized gas masks after the Big Day and assured us that the bridges and tunnels into Manhattan were rigged to blow up.  I was lost a long time before 9/11 though. I was born without an internal compass and no innate sense of direction, and come to think of it, I lack direction in my life, and I’m missing a moral compass.  I feel like I deserve a Handicapped sign for my windshield for these maladies, and maybe if I had one of those I wouldn’t have gotten three parking tickets in a week.  So far this job has cost me more money than I’ve made.  

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Read more tomorrow when our friend takes us back to her place.  Meet us @ D Girl Diary.